


Query

by melonbutterfly



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Brainwashing, Gen, Mindfuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-17
Updated: 2014-05-17
Packaged: 2018-01-25 11:40:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1647365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melonbutterfly/pseuds/melonbutterfly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something is broken in him, in his head, and the realization of it fills him with a sudden urgency – <em>return to base.</em></p>
<p>
  <em>Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="small">An experimentation on what might happen when the fledglings of independent thought meet a wiped & reprogrammed mind.</span>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Query

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hannahrhen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannahrhen/gifts).



He walks. He walks and walks and walks. He sees things and knows not their designation; he sees clear line of vision, passable exit strategy, adequate cover, good nest. Potential witness/collateral. Potential target. Potential target. Potential target.

Not target.

People. They look at him, their eyes on his face and he thinks _covert. Return to base._

They sound like orders and he knows orders, orders are familiar, so he follows them. _Covert. Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

Nobody sees him. The gun feels too light on his hip, not many bullets left because he shot them into the target – abysmal shots, the mark of an abundance of something not quite in his head, not quite in his chest, not quite in his stomach and yet somehow in all of them, making his hands tremble, making him hesitate where he should not. Such a mess, chaos in his head, something loud that he tries to file away as _distraction: irrelevant_ , but it does not work. He is faulty. He is broken. Something is broken in him, in his head, and the realization of it fills him with a sudden urgency – _return to base._

_Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

The target lives. He shot the target three times, yet the target lives.

_Bucky_ , the target says in his mind, staring at him from a distance in the middle of an asphalt street. It is an image he knows not the origin of, knows not how to file away.

_Distraction: irrelevant_ , his mind insists, but another part stirs in something like protest. He thinks, any information on the target could potentially be of significance.

There is a strange sound in his belly, rasping. _Hunger_ , his mind supplies, _sustenance. Return to base._

_Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

He dismisses _query: sustenance._

He knows not what to do now. It's a fact that stops him in his tracks. Where is he?

_Urban area_ , his mind supplies, _easy to hide, easy to eliminate target, easy to get away._ If executed under the parameter of: _absolute covertness._

Abandoning his mostly-hidden-from-view trek he flattens himself to a wall, then climbs to the top of the house. Roof: better vantage point. An open window: easy entrance.

He stays on the roof and looks down.

He recalls: The target fell. _He fell._ He watched. _The target watched._

That's wrong. He did not fall. The target did not watch him fall. He watched as the target fell. _I'm not going to fight you._

An image of the target's face frozen- not frozen, not frozen, no, no. Still.

Yes. Still. An expression on his face his mind identifies as-

Irrelevant?

_No._

He knows not why, but he refuses that. _Denied._

His mind is sluggish to respond. _Any information about the target is relevant._ A direct conflict with _Irrelevant._

_You are broken_ , something whispers in his head. _Return to base_ , his mind immediately responds, the force of it droning out anything else, if only for a moment.

_Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

He is starting to think that his mind might be a little slow. _Return to base, indefinitely suspended_ , he insists again. Perhaps his mind has been damaged.

_Return to base_ , his mind immediately responds.

_Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

He thinks it very firmly, so his mind will understand; perhaps the damage has slowed his mind down, but it only repeats to him like a broken record-

Record? Broken record?

His mind remains silent. The query is met with _irrelevant_ , and yet he cannot shake it. He knows not what a record is, much less a broken one, so where did the thought come from? Is he-?

He is the Asset. He is the Weapon. _Designation: Winter Soldier._

_Yes._ This is true. But he is not sure he can trust the mind anymore. _Return to base, indefinitely suspended_ , he insists, and the mind responds: _return to base._

The mind is broken.

Did he break his mind? He has to follow orders, he knows that. He did not. He did not eliminate the target. Why did he not eliminate the target?

The target did not fight him. The target surrendered. Thus he did not eliminate the target?

Is this the correct response? Just as the correct response to hunger is the acquiring of sustenance?

_Return to base_ , his mind immediately interjects. _Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised_ , he thinks back at it.

Cues. Test: one after the other, he lists: _need for: sustenance, weapons, ammunition. Damage to: mind, body. Mission status: failed. Orders?_

His mind meets each query with the response: _return to base. Return to base. Return to base. Return to base._

Each time, he responds: _Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

His mind has no counter-response.

He tests again: _mission status: failed._

_Return to base._

_Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._

Nothing.

He notes his lack of weapons, orders, the screaming in his head. The mind responds to every query with the same order: _return to base._

There is no response to: _Return to base, indefinitely suspended: base has been compromised._ There is no response to: _no._

He categorizes the damage to his body, every broken rib, every bruise, the slowed response of his arm, and his mind responds with: _irrelevant._

_No._

_Return to base._

_No._

Query: reaction, he thinks. There is only ever one reaction, but a variation of queries. Some queries such as _sternum: bruised_ are dismissed initially until he denies the dismissal while some queries are met with clarification, such as _hunger: sustenance: return to base_. Some, such as: _mind: broken: return to base_ are not, but are reinforced with an urgency _hunger: sustenance_ is not. But all of them conclude in one single order, the dismissal of which contains no response. It leaves his mind essentially unfunctional.

Since his mind cannot be intentionally unfunctional, this allows only one conclusion: his mind is broken. As a consequence, he cannot trust anything it tells him. _Any orders supplied by mind: indefinitely suspended._

What now?

Somehow he knows that the simplistic orders of _mind_ are supposed to be sufficient. There is a chain of commands built into his head but he cannot follow it anymore. There two options he can think of that in some fashion meet his orders: _find: alternative base. Complete mission: eliminate target._ and a third one: _investigate: mind: broken._

That last one is not a suggestion based on his orders, and yet it still occurs to him. He focuses on it. The symptoms of _mind: broken_ must have started before he even became aware of _mind: broken_. It is the only explanation for _mission status: failed._

Why did he not complete the mission? It was not an accident or mistake. Accidents or mistakes do not happen to him and even if they did, they would not repeatedly. 

More than that, he actively worked _against_ the mission. Despite his abysmal attempts at completing the mission, the target would be dead now if he had not dragged it out of the water. It is an anomaly he cannot process.

Three shots, non-fatal. Direct engagement, result: _Your name is James Buchanan Barnes._

_James Buchanan Barnes_ , a voice in his head whispers, _Sergeant, three two five five seven._

This is not the part of his mind that meets his queries with orders.

Carefully, tentatively, he tests that part. Query: _mind: broken._

_Return to base,_ his mind blares. _Steve_ , that small part whispers, almost inaudible above the strength of the order.

_Your target is Steven Grant Rogers. Eliminate with extreme prejudice._

_No._

_Return to base._

_No._

_Steve,_ he whispers to the small part of his mind.

_You're my friend._

Query: _friend?_

No part of his mind has a response.

Query: _James Buchanan Barnes, Sergeant, three two five five seven._

No part of his mind has a response.

A name, a rank, a number. What is that number? Why is it in his head?

_Order?_

_Return to base._

_No. Order: find origin of number._

He does not think it will work. He isn't the one who gives the orders; he is the one who follows them. But miraculously, his mind, any part of it, remains quiet.

Tentatively, he tries again.

_Order?_

_Find origin of number: three two five five seven._

He has an executable order.

_Mission status: ongoing._


End file.
